Writing in the Cracks

Creating a routine that fits your schedule

When I was in the newborn phase with my kids, there was a word that absolutely drove me bonkers.

Routine.

“Start a routine early.” Generally good advice, except with my kids, I wasn’t the one driving the routine. They were. Nap time? That’s on their terms. Meals? Cluster feeding every 20 minutes. Bath? What day is it again? Don’t forget work and daycare and spending quality time with your other kids, and maybe 10 minutes to yourself after bed time.

I tried, I really did. But every time we got some semblance of routine together, they would hit the next stage of development and it would all go right out the window.

So when I looked for help figuring out time to write with a baby and found that word again, I about lost it.

How the **** was I supposed to set a writing routine when I wasn’t in charge of my time?

The Usual Advice

You’ve heard it all. If you want to write with kids, you need to get up earlier, stay up later, want it more.

Make writing a priority.

Writing was a priority, but I could barely function on the sleep I was getting. I couldn’t give up any more of it.

But when I mentioned that, I got shrugs and “well, maybe you just need to wait until they’re older.”

That wasn’t going to work for me.

Last week, we talked about orienteering and identifying obstacles. I did that. I could see my checkpoint, and I’d identified my obstacles, but the route everyone else was taking just didn’t work for me.

So I made my own.

A Time Audit for Moms

Traditional time audits aren’t super helpful as a busy parent, since the problem isn’t that you’re wasting time—it’s that you have no time.

How do you make more time?

You don’t. You rearrange it. You manage it, like the manager you are. Except this time, you give yourself priority as well as the rest of your family. That’s the thing about motherhood—you’re always expected to put yourself last. Your needs go behind everyone else’s wants. And when you dare to ask for more than leftover scraps, you’re made to feel selfish.

That isn’t true. That’s just a narrative that’s been repeated often enough to feel inevitable.

It’s up to you to write a new narrative.

Starting with your time.

I created the Busy Parent’s Time Audit to help you do just that. Subscribe to get your free copy!

A few tips for filling this out:

• Block out the times you have to work around, like work, school, naps, etc. to find openings in your schedule.
• See what you can move around to free up bigger spaces of time for your writing.
• Keep your ideal schedule in mind as you fill this out. How much time you need to write? What can you move around, delegate to someone else, or eliminate altogether to make sure you can get that time?

It doesn’t have to be 2 hour blocks of time, either. If it’s too hard to fit those long writing sessions into your day, break them up. I didn’t think this would be possible with my writing process because I prefer to take my time getting into the story, but even I was able to adapt. When you only have 20 minutes, you can’t spend 15 easing back into each scene. You have to jump in, make a mess, and climb back out with words still dripping off you. Then when you have another 10 minutes, jump in again. The more you do it, the more story fragments you still have clinging to you when you pull yourself out, the easier it is to immerse yourself back in the next time.

And finally: be flexible. You may not be able to write at the same time or for the same amount of time every day. You may have to reschedule your writing sessions if something else comes up. This can be frustrating, but it goes with the territory of being a parent—and it’s a lot easier to roll with missed or interrupted sessions if you know you have more planned for later in the day or the week.

Adjusting the way you write is difficult, but it’s a skill that you can learn just like any other. You are not limited by your creativity. What has worked for you in the past is not the only way you can do things. Your creativity is yours, not the other way around.

Make it work for you.

Experiment with these scheduling planners, figure out when you can build in writing time, and try it out for a few days. If it doesn’t work, switch it up and try again. Remember not to discount short writing sessions, and make sure to share your plans and victories in the chat. Next week, we’ll go over some strategies for setting boundaries around your writing time.

Keep writing!

~Rachael